Chapter 1 – Rebirth
The sky was gloomy, with dark clouds churning, but there was no sign of rain falling. The courtyard outside was filled with cars, and media reporters and fans who came to pay their respects were crowded together. There was no noise; everyone was very quiet.
Bai Jinyan, who had risen to fame at a young age and was at the peak of his popularity, tragically passed away in a car accident. The people who came to pay their respects filled the entire street.
On the second-floor corridor, dim lights cast the shadow of a slender figure of a young man, with half of his delicate face hidden in the shadow of the curtain. His hand by his side clenched tightly, and with his eyes slightly drooping, he heard footsteps and paused. He then turned around and said, “Aunt Meng.”
Meng Zhen nodded, “Too many things have happened these days, and I really don’t have the energy to deal with them. Thankfully, you are here to help me.”
She approached and handed the key to the young man, her voice as soft as a thread, “Please take care of Jinyan’s belongings for me.”
Seeing her pale complexion and signs of exhaustion, the young man, Qiao Huaiyao, furrowed his brows involuntarily, “Aunt Meng, you need to take care of yourself…”
“I’m fine.” Meng Zhen curved her lips, but she couldn’t muster a smile. “I’ll go downstairs first. There are so many people down there; it’s not good for me to stay away for too long.”
As she finished speaking, before Qiao Huaiyao could say anything else, Meng Zhen had already turned and left.
Inserting the key into the lock, Qiao Huaiyao slowly turned the doorknob. From the moment he heard about Bai Jinyan’s death to attending his funeral, he still couldn’t quite believe it all. Somehow, he had mindlessly agreed to Aunt Meng’s request.
As he was about to open the door and enter Bai Jinyan’s bedroom, he hesitated again.
After a moment of silence, Qiao Huaiyao closed his eyes, took a deep breath, and pushed open the bedroom door.
At the corner of the stairs, Meng Zhen looked up at the young man walking into the room, her mind filled with thoughts, and she couldn’t help but let out a sigh, wiping away the tears at the corner of her eyes, she walked down slowly.
Qiao Huaiyao entered the bedroom and casually placed the key in the small box woven with rattan on the left side.
When he saw a photo frame standing beside the small box, Qiao Huaiyao’s fingertips paused. It was a picture of him and Bai Jinyan during their high school days, their shoulders leaning against each other.
Looking at the two figures in the photo, Qiao Huaiyao’s lips slightly tightened, and a touch of bitterness emerged in his heart. He and Bai Jinyan were neighbors and grew up together. They were close and spent a lot of time together. They attended the same school since elementary school.
However, after the college entrance exam, Bai Jinyan suddenly started to distance himself from Qiao Huaiyao without any reason. Despite Qiao Huaiyao’s attempts to find out the reason, he couldn’t get any answers. Around the same time, he received admission letters from two prestigious universities with similar standards, making it difficult for him to choose. In a fit of anger, and partly because of the situation with Bai Jinyan, he chose the farthest university, packed his bags, and cut off all contact with him.
A few days ago, Qiao Huaiyao received an apology in a short phone call from an unknown number. He could tell from the weak voice who it was – Bai Jinyan.
He sounded as if he was struggling to speak, with pauses in between each few words. Qiao Huaiyao felt something was off, but before he could ask anything, Bai Jinyan hung up the phone. When he called back, there was no answer. A few hours later, he saw the news about the accident on TV, and everything went black before his eyes.
From buying the plane ticket, getting on the flight, to attending Bai Jinyan’s funeral, Qiao Huaiyao still couldn’t believe it all, immersed in a daze of confusion and helplessness.
He wished he knew that they would never have another chance to meet calmly again. Qiao Huaiyao thought that if he had known, he would have told Bai Jinyan everything he had been keeping hidden, even if it would make their relationship more awkward.
Clamping his teeth together, Qiao Huaiyao turned the photo frame upside down, stubbornly refusing to look at the picture inside. There were several folded cardboard boxes on the floor, one of them containing a few books, and the rest were empty. Qiao Huaiyao pulled one of the empty boxes over and carefully packed the photo frame with foam strips before putting it inside.
After carefully wrapping up the small fragile items and arranging them in the box, Qiao Huaiyao spent quite some time just sorting out the items on the table.
As he sealed the box, before he could stand up, he heard a dull thud behind him. It sounded like something had fallen on the ground.
Qiao Huaiyao turned his head to look, and several books on the top shelf of the bookcase had fallen to the ground. The books on the lower shelves followed suit, one after another.
Frowning, Qiao Huaiyao noticed that the top shelf had become loose and slanted, causing the books in front to fall, and the ones behind followed suit.
Folded pages, several opened books, scattered in twos and threes on the floor.
He let out a soft sigh, squatting by the pile of books, about to pick up the top one when he froze upon reading its contents. Qiao Huaiyao’s pupils suddenly contracted, his eyes fixed without blinking on that book.
The three characters “Qiao Huaiyao“ occupied the entire page.
What…?
Qiao Huaiyao’s heart tightened, trembling as he picked up the book, only to discover that it was a diary. The edges of the diary cover were slightly worn, bearing traces of frequent use.
Flipping open the diary, there were only a few sentences recorded inside, followed by page after page of his name.
Running his finger over the sharp strokes of the pen, Qiao Huaiyao couldn’t help but redden his eyes. Turning the thin pages, the next page also had “Qiao Huaiyao“ written three times.
Qiao Huaiyao leaned against the wall, holding the diary in his hands, turning the pages one by one.
Until his name disappeared, leaving large blank spaces on the paper, with only a single line of a date written in the middle. It was the day he reported to school. The handwriting was sloppy, and the last stroke seemed to cut through the paper.
Seeing this, Qiao Huaiyao’s heart trembled, and the bitterness and grievances magnified instantly. Tears unexpectedly fell on the diary as he closed his eyes, letting the tears slide down. His lips tightened into a line, not making a sound, wiping away the traces on the paper, and closing the diary.
Qiao Huaiyao couldn’t understand, couldn’t comprehend why this was happening!
It wasn’t an inexplicable estrangement; Bai Jinyan just didn’t tell him. He had initially thought that Bai Jinyan genuinely wanted to cut ties with him.
No matter how many times he tried to find out, he couldn’t get an answer. He had thought it was just a momentary anger, and that things would get better after cooling down.
But now…
If he had known how things would turn out, when they had argued, he would have grasped Bai Jinyan and demanded all the answers.
Qiao Huaiyao leaned back, tilting his head up, clutching the diary tightly to his chest, his fingertips pressing against the edge of the diary turned white.
He closed his eyes tightly, his heart pounding, and tears wetting his collar.
It felt as though an invisible hand was tightly clenching his heart, and the outside sounds seemed to have dispersed, leaving only the fading daylight by the window.
As night fell in the room, boundless darkness enveloped his neck, making it difficult to breathe.
Qiao Huaiyao curled up in the corner, the midnight moonlight cold as frost, pouring into the room.
He frowned, his dry eyes stung with any movement, and at this moment, the moonlight was too glaring. He struggled to squint his eyes, burying his head in his knees, losing consciousness completely.
…
“Classmate? Classmate!” Under the scorching sun, a senior student welcoming the freshmen waved the admission brochures in her hand, inquiring doubtfully, “Classmate, Qiao Huaiyao? Are you listening?” She pointed to the roster on the table. “Sign in here for registration, and then you can go in and choose your dormitory.”
Under the shade of the umbrella, the male student slowly raised his gaze.
His handsome face showed a hint of confusion, and his slightly upturned peach blossom eyes revealed a moment of hesitation.
Where is this?
Wasn’t he in Bai Jinyan’s room, packing up his belongings?
Why is he here?
At the side of the desk was a diary with a date marked on the corner – Clear University’s registration date.
Qiao Huaiyao’s pupils suddenly contracted; this is…
Tsinghua University’s registration day?
Qiao Huaiyao’s mind was in turmoil, and the busy environment around him made his already unclear mind even more sluggish. The admission roster he held in his hand had already wrinkled at the page under his fingertips, tightly clenched.
Upon hearing the senior student’s voice, Qiao Huaiyao suddenly came to his senses, forcing himself to calm down. He blinked his eyes lightly, concealing the uneasiness on his face, and gave a faint smile. “No, it’s nothing. I just suddenly remembered that there’s something to do at home. I apologize.”
Saying that, Qiao Huaiyao put down the roster in his hand, quickly signed his name at the registration desk, then grabbed his suitcase and left.
“Hey? Classmate!” The senior student was taken aback, only catching a glimpse of his back as he hurried away. She called out, “What’s the rush? You haven’t chosen a dormitory yet…”
Qiao Huaiyao didn’t stop his footsteps, not even looking back as he waved his hand and said, “I’ll follow the school’s arrangement.”
…
Looking at the hustle and bustle of Tsinghua University and the congested traffic, the surreal feeling of being in a dream was shattered at this moment.
Qiao Huaiyao couldn’t help but breathe a sigh of relief; he had indeed come back.
Back to the day he reported to university.
At this time, Bai Jinyan should still be at home.
Tsinghua University starts registration five days earlier, while Bai Jinyan’s university would have a later registration date.
Qiao Huaiyao’s steps were hurried as he walked out of the school gate, fumbling with his phone in his hand. Anxious to open a chat app, he urgently wanted to contact Bai Jinyan.
However, as he looked through the contacts, his fingertips paused involuntarily.
He had deleted all of Bai Jinyan’s chat accounts…
He couldn’t send a message.
…
Unable to send a message, Qiao Huaiyao reluctantly closed the chat app. His fingers quickly moved, opening the dialer and without hesitation, he dialed a number from memory.
However, after dialing, it only gave a busy tone.
Did he change the number?
Qiao Huaiyao felt doubtful, but he double-checked the phone number and redialed.
Again, he got a busy tone.
Standing in front of the taxi sign, he watched the approaching taxi and raised his hand to hail it. Once he got in the car, Qiao Huaiyao said, “Driver, go to the airport.”